Only by winning people through virtue can you make them truly submit.
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From Mencius (《孟子·公孙丑上》): 以力服人者,非心服也... 以德服人者,中心悦而诚服也 — 'submission gained by force is not heartfelt; submission gained by virtue is both glad and genuine.' The distinction between forced and willing acceptance is the point of the whole phrase.