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二者不可得兼

èrzhěbùkědéjiān
phrase

Meanings

  1. 1 the two cannot both be had
  2. 2 (fig.) you have to choose — both options cannot be taken at once
  3. 3 (lit.) two — things — not — can — obtain — together

Examples

事业和家庭有时二者不可得兼。
Shìyè hé jiātíng yǒushí èr zhě bùkě dé jiān.
Career and family — sometimes 'the two cannot both be had.'
鱼和熊掌二者不可得兼，必须取舍。
Yú hé xióngzhǎng èr zhě bùkě dé jiān, bìxū qǔshě.
'Fish and bear's paw cannot both be had' — you must choose.

Tips

history
From 《孟子·告子上》 (Mencius, Gaozi I, c. 4th c. BCE), the canonical 'fish and bear's paw' passage: 鱼，我所欲也；熊掌，亦我所欲也。二者不可得兼，舍鱼而取熊掌者也 (Fish is what I desire; bear's paw is also what I desire. If the two cannot both be had, I would give up the fish and take the bear's paw). Mencius then uses it as a parable for choosing yi (righteousness) over life itself. The source of both this phrase and 舍生取义.
usage
得 here = classical 'to be able to obtain' (not modern 'gain'). 兼 = 'both at once / concurrently.' Virtually always invoked when framing a hard either/or choice, especially morally loaded ones.

Stroke Order

二 èr
者 zhě
不 bù
可 kě
得 dé
兼 jiān